Friday, March 29, 2013

Heating & AC Guy

Curtis:  I get to watch him suck my ducts out!  I wonder what a duck sounds like when it get sucked out.

New Technology

John:  What do we call this thing?  The Blow and Suck Machine?
Don:  No.  It's the Suck and Blow.

Saturday, March 23, 2013

Tired Legs

Jeny: Sorry dude.
Adam: For what?
Jeny: You got chicked.
Adam: You know what? Today she can have it.

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Freezing Rain

Adam: Are we really going to ski in this?
Jen: Oh yeah. This is awesome skiing weather dude.
Adam: No, this is good sitting inside drinking scotch weather.

Don't Push It

Adam: You know what's awesome about you?
Jen: Everything.

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

GAIL

Gail: Oh wait.. the test does not require on-line unless I change my mind.  I promise not to change my mind until we are within 2-hours of starting the test.  Then I’ll not only ask for on-line but I’ll try to double the number of channels and test conditions.

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Avoid A Fall -- Use Handrail

Toby:  Someone must have ate shit on the stairs.  Don't tell me to use them as a gym then tell me I might DIE when I do.

Friday, March 8, 2013

All Day Meetings

Bernie: This is buckets of suck.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Self Help Book Titles

Don: Maybe someone should leave a copy of "How to Win Friends and Influence People" on Mark's desk.
Jen: Or, "How to Not Piss Off Your Coworkers and Subsequently Not End Up in the Duwamish with Cement Shoes."
Don:  Or, "If You Want Someone Else to Help You With Something You Don't Know How to Do, Maybe You Shouldn't Be a Giant Dick."

Friday, March 1, 2013

Hungry

Adam: I need peanut butter.