Monday, January 28, 2013

Medical Advice (via text)

Zana: Paging Dr. Adam -- Torn calf muscle (pretty sure).  Mayonanaise?
Jen/Adam: Mustard.  Dijon is best.
Zana: Should I eat it or just shove it up my ass?
Jen/Adam: Rectal for maximum effect.  Applied with a pickle.
Zana: Perfect.  It will only match how I feel.
Jen/Adam: And possibly improve it.

Friday, January 18, 2013

Blinky Lights

Joel: Electricity to the rescue once again.

Tuesday, January 15, 2013


Jen: I ran across my workout plans from winter two years ago.
Pat: You were much harder back then.
Jen: Now I'm soft and squishy.

Thursday, January 10, 2013

Why I love my job

Miller: It would have been much easier if we could just saw a hole in the floor.

Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Still Working

Ken: Crappy commute this morning.  Add that to the fact that I didn't win the lottery and have to be here in the first place.  But at least no one will be trying to pour cyanide down my throat while I'm not looking.

Monday, January 7, 2013

A Gift for Whitefish.

Zana: I can't believe you hid that f--king squeaky toy in the couch!  I found it and said to Pete, Look at this. No way Gaia put that there. No way it got "lost" there. That motherf--ker was put here on purpose.

Thursday, January 3, 2013

Measures of Time

Zana: What time are you guys getting up to go to V-Trees?
Adam: Sometime after Pete gets out of the bathroom.

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Zana's interpretation.

Gaia: You guys stay up late and embarrass me.

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Greatest Tag Line Ever

Adam: Douchebags - Chicks dig them.

Ski Jackets

Pete: I'm gonna put on my blue jacket, cuz we look like a bag of f--king skittles.

New Year's Hangover

Zana: I am 20% cleaner and feel 4% better.