Monday, October 31, 2011

Grizzly Behavior

Zana:  I would never give a Grizzly my Subaru.  That indeed WOULD be bad.

40 Years of Drinking

Richard:  I should not be eligible for a liver transplant.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Weekend Work

Phil:  Don't worry, I'll be on call.  With my phone off.

Thursday, October 27, 2011


Jim: I found that 27 times is necessary for the common person to grasp a concept.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Mt. Cruiser

Adam:  Aw, we should have brought some snow back down with us.
Jen: But would it still be snow at this point?
Adam:  We could have packed it in ice.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Waiting Up

Adam:  That wasn't waiting up!  That was sleeping on the couch waiting for the dog to bark.  Waiting up is watching reruns of MacGyver with toothpicks holding your eyelids open with the epipen poised just in case you do fall asleep.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Working the Holidays

Hang Time

Don:  He could suck the chrome off of a trailer hitch.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Computer Upgrade

Don:  Wait, do you have 64-bit Matlab installed?
Jen: I have no Matlab versions installed.  I sent screen shots of the failed installation process to Kung Fu Sonny who is "helping" me with this.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011


Adam:  I've already ran five miles and had a full breakfast.  And then I practiced tuba for an hour.  And pulled orphans out of a burning building.  And planted a tree.  What have you done?

Monday, October 17, 2011

Tall cabinets

Phil: Have you hugged a cabinet today?  I was wondering what you were doing - having sex with a cabinet like that is bad for you.  You should at least lay it down on the floor so you can look it in the eye.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Taco Burps

Curtis:  I think I'm going to spit up a f-ing alien here in a minute.